Being Single. Drinking Double. Seeing Triple.

My ears hurt and feel like they’ve been stuffed with cotton. My nose is running. My throat is sore. My glands feel like they’re swelling up. I have a horrendous cough. I feel nauseous and achey too.

Blech.

And I have a fuck-ton of work on atm.

Shit.

And I’m supposed to be going to Hospitality on Friday night and having a fucked-up, messy, hedonistic night… But I’m not going to be able to go out if this gets much worse and even then, if I am this under the weather, I’m not going to want to ingest various substances now am I?

Balls.

Going to kick up a beauty/grooming routine and stick to it. Maybe go and get a Mani-pedi and some waxing, half the big stuff is done then!

Apply to some summer placements.

St John Ambulance sessions on a Thursday night. Book onto a formal first aid course.

Keep on top of my assignments. Do the bioinformatics one asap - or at least START it…

Sort out a housekeeping schedule for laundry, cleaning and general upkeep.

Give everything in my room a home. Organisation is key.

Print lectures in advance where possible.

Snowboard as frequently as time and money allows.

Go to the gym. You’ve paid £90 for an all hours access pass. USE IT. Try some classes or something - zumba? Use the pool on a weekend.

Quit smoking. It’s not exams and you coped fine at home for 5 weeks…

Well, that’s a start.

Every piece of clothing I’ve had on in the last three weeks or so has gone into the laundry basket, especially stuff on the floor, even if I’ve worn it once.

The clean laundry has gone away, jackets and coats hung up. Makeup and perfumes organised in the bathroom.

Mini-fridge stocked with alcohol. Food away in the drawer. Rubbish in the bin.

Accessories in one bag to be sorted out, notes and lecture printouts in another. Bathroom stuff needing to go in the drawer in a third. Medication back in it’s bag.

Bedside table thing wiped, most of the stuff on it cleared away. Remaining? Lamp, drink, phone (and charger), a couple of hair bobbles, hand cream, mints, pill, torch.

Long shower, even used a comb and a conditioning mask to get out the tangles. Got out a new toothbrush and my really gritty toothpaste and polished my teeth too.

I need to sort my life out. My room is disgusting. Just stuff EVERYWHERE.

Clothes in the wash basket. Clean sheets. Lectures organised into files. Revision notes into a file. Rubbish in the bin. Stuff in it’s rightful place.

I don’t even know why I’ve got this way. It’s horrendous. I was never like this.

Also quit smoking and start whitening my teeth up again.

Seriously, what is wrong with me?

1. Left me out of housing… Thanks, thanks a lot.
2. Lied to me about having sorted out housing - “we’re doing it all after exams” - bullshit, you sorted it on Facebook over the Christmas holidays. Just keep stringing me along huh?
3. Always accuse me of being messy and leaving shit everywhere…
4. Sorry but who was on her hands and knees last night cleaning up someones puke whilst you were all having a night out? Just so we didn’t get a whacking great cleaning fine and possibly a carpet replacement fine at £80 per square metre.
5. No thanks for that either…
6. Don’t even mention the fact that one of the boys has smashed in a door window on our corridor that we are getting fined for. Or that another section of carpet will need replacing because this girl spat out her chewing gum onto the floor, refused to pick it up and bin it and it has been walked into the fibres. Or that they had a tomato fight during pre-drinks and trashed my kitchen. As well as all the other pre-drink mess - smashed crockery, empty cans and bottles everywhere, dirty glasses and cups, drink spilled EVERYWHERE. Definitely cleaned that up so it wouldn’t stain earning us fines too.
7. Again, no thanks…
8. Helping yourself to my baking ingredients without asking. “they were in an open drawer, we figured we could.” Who the hell do you think put them there?! The magical baking fairy?!
9. Not only that but downplaying how much you actually took…
10. …and not only not asking but also taking it from my kitchen on our corridor whilst I’m sat having a drink with you in your kitchen. HELLO I’M SAT RIGHT HERE, YOU ARE TALKING TO ME ABOUT STUFF IN GENERAL, CAN YOU NOT ASK ME IF YOU CAN BORROW MY SHIT?!
11. Not even saving me a damn cupcake despite it being made with half my shit.
12. And not replacing the stuff you took. Thanks a bunch.
13. Giving me a reputation for being a “waster”… Sorry but firstly - how often have I been on a night out with everyone?! Rarely. Secondly - has anybody ever had to cut their night short to take me home? Or look after me in general? No. I know my limits, fuck off.
14. … and even when I have ingested something other than alcohol, I am fairly salient and in control and tend to wander off and see things and see people but I am always fine. I never need babysitting.
15. Then, when I am in said state and I am quite contentedly sprawled on a sofa so therefore in the flat and safe and not causing chaos or mayhem, you decide its a GREAT time to tell me specific reasons why people don’t want to live with me. Before asking me REPEATEDLY if I have been hurt by the whole deal… No of course I haven’t, I am actually a robotic humanoid with no heart, no soul and no feelings or emotions. But seriously - was she just looking for me to vindicate her drama with “yes, I’m really hurt, waaaah”?!
16. Constantly bringing up housing and how you should all go for a house dinner together to celebrate signing the contract and how you are living in a 9-bed place, but the 10 was nicer and it’s a shame there was nobody else you wanted to live with… Rubbing salt in the wound much?
17. bragging to me about how much money you’ve spent/are spending. I DON’T CARE.
18. On the one hand completely outright ignoring me and then asking me “you’re on 02 right? Do you have a spare phone? Could I borrow it? Mine’s fucked.” Yes I have a spare phone, no you can’t borrow it.
19. “OMG she’s at the window [of the kitchen door] - don’t let her in! I don’t want her in here! Nobody likes her.”
20. [on the phone] Me : “hey are you in town?” Girl 1: “nopes I’m in bed with a hangover, why?” Me : “thought everyone was in town. was going to join you all.” Girl 1: “nopes, sorry!” ….
    [phonecall 2] Me: “hey, you in town?” Girl 2: “Yeah why?” Me: “fancy shopping, I’ll come down and meet you all?” Girl 2: “okay sure.”
    Got into town. Couldn’t get hold of them. 45 mins later as I’m heading out of town, phone rings…
    Girl 2: “Hey. Sorry, didn’t hear phone go. Have you left town?” Me: “was just about to. figured you were busy.” Girl 2: “I guess you could meet us.”
    Meet up with them - Girl 2 is not only with a couple of other flatmates but Girl 1 is there too.
    “Thought you were in bed?” “I changed my mind!”
    Seriously, get that girl to Hogwarts, she can already disapparate…
    (or not, girl 2 accidentally let the cat out of the bag that she’d been with them the whole time and therefore lied to me deliberately)
21. Sat in the corridor chatting with 2 girls only because 1 of them knocked on my door to see what I was up to as she was bored. One of them rapidly made her excuses - “I want to go back into my room, [another flatmate] is on Skype!” - invited the other girl in, shut the door on me. I’m still in the corridor as I cannot be arsed moving and I need to complain.

It’s all the small things. They add up. And I can’t do shit about it because they wouldn’t give a crap. These are just things from the past few weeks. Pretty fucking sick of it. I HATE LIVING WITH THESE PEOPLE RIGHT NOW.

completecarnage:

With nobody to share it with.

Worst.

It’s 4.40am, I’m drunk and this is relevant.